How to Stop Arguing with Your Children

Sometimes I am in the middle of an argument with one of my children before I even realize what is happening! How did this happen?

How can I make sure I am having a fruitful conservation with my kids instead of an argument. I can do this by operating according to this biblical principle: Correction can take the form of discipleship instead of discipline when there is respect and teachability.

In this video I explain how to apply this principle to conversations with your children and stop the arguing! This is part 8 of the series How to Help Your Children Become Self-Motivated. 

When Should You Give Your Children More Freedom?

Photo by Bruno Nascimento on Unsplash

As our children grow up, one thing you can be sure to expect is that they will desire more freedom. An immediate difficulty we face is the common misunderstand of what freedom is and how one obtains it. Our culture teaches us (and maybe it is a natural assumption) that freedom is our ability to do whatever we want and that freedom is our inherent right. These things are not true. 

As you struggle with your pre-teens and teens in their fight for freedom, do you know how to teach them the true meaning of freedom and the legitimate way of obtaining it? Watch this brief video to learn more about the biblical economy of freedom and responsibility. This is Part 7 in the video series How to Help Your Children Become Self-Motivated.

When "Because I Said So" Isn't Good Enough

The most popular question that my children to ask is "Why?" I have to admit that I have allowed this question to irritate me at times. Often the best answer is "Because I said so." However, it doesn't work all the time. If we are working to raise our children to be mature, Christ loving believers, then we are going to have to come up with a better answer. We are going to have to tell they why.

Photo by Gaelle Marcel on Unsplash

Part of being mature is being self-motivated. The key to being self-motivated, as opposed to only being driven by outside forces, is to know the "why" of what we are doing. We must understand the heart and purpose of our actions. 

One of the most important roles we play as parents is to help our children develop a biblical worldview in which the "why" questions are answered from God's perspective. Check out Part 6 of my video series How to Help Your Children Become Self-Motivated to dig a little deeper into how we can give our children the "whys" of the Christian life.

What Role Does the Scripture Play in Your Home?

Do you know how many Christian parents I know who believe in the importance and power of God's Word in our lives, and yet do not include Bible reading and teaching in the daily life of the home? Too many. I have also spent periods of my own parenting career neglecting this.

In this short video, I remind us of the importance of Scripture in discipling our children and give some simple tips for taking action. This is Part 5 in the video series How to Help Your Children Become Self-Motivated.

Why do you think that parents fail to read and teach the Scripture in their homes? What are the issues you have struggled with? How do you use God's Word in your home?  Please leave a comment and tell us about it!

A Boy at the Cross-Roads of Life

As a boy in middle school, I was right on the edge of heading in the wrong direction. There was a great battle going on for my mind and spirit. Then one critical day I hit a cross-roads. The Lord spoke to me and called me to follow him. You can hear the story of what happened in Part 3 of the video series How to Help to Help Your Children Become Self-Motivated.

We have all experienced this battle. Your children will too. What can you do to help them? What can you do to facilitate a one-on-one encounter with God for your child? 

In this video, we will explore the important difference between discipline (using external motivation) and discipleship (developing internal motivation). You can learn to successfully transition from discipline to discipleship and help bring about a true heart transformation in your children.

Can you remember a crossroads like this in your life? Can you remember the people in your life that helped you move in the right direction? Leave a comment below and tell us about it. 

Photo by Steve Halama on Unsplash

Have You Discovered the Ultimate Goal of Parenting?

What we are aiming for as parents has a major impact on how we relate to and raise our children every day. Have you discovered the ultimate goal of parenting from God's point of view? It is easy for us to get distracted by all sorts of other parenting goals and motives that will not produce the outcome we are really looking for. 

Here is Part 2 of my video series on How to Help Your Children Become Self-Motivated. [Hint: Helping your children to become self-motivated is not the ultimate goal of parenting!]

Are You Teaching Your Kids About Personal Finances?

"Parents cannot abdicate the teaching of finances to the schools, because the schools aren't teaching it. It's astounding to think that you can get through elementary school, high school, and college and still not know how to balance a checkbook, or buy a home, or decide what kind of insurance you need. But, unfortunately, that's the norm."

You will find this paragraph in the introduction of the Money Matters for Teens Workbook by Larry Burkett with Todd Temple. For those of us who have children in public (and probably even private) school, this is a helpful reminder that we cannot depend on the schools to prepare our children for life. In addition to teaching practical matter of life (like finances), Christian parents have to remember that God has given us the responsibility to disciple our children (Deut 6:4-9; Eph 6:4). We cannot depend on others to fulfill this role in our children's lives (not even the church!). 

For those of us who homeschool our children, this norm only confirms our reasoning for home education. But it is probably still worth asking home educators: Are you making sure to include personal finance in your teaching plan? We are using this workbook as a part of ours. 

One more reason that teaching personal finance to our children is important: "It's sad that half of all marriages today fail and, overwhelmingly, the major factor is the mismanagement of money." 

[Photo by Olly Joy on Unsplash]

The Story of the Missing Wallet

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